*honesty

A combination of the paralyzing isolation a new baby can bring, cold weather, distance from all sides of family and feelings of being left out of the daily community we could have with them, hormones, lack of sleep, lack of money, bickering children, a public school experience that leaves me sad, distanced and worried about my little girl, a lingering sense of awkwardness around the friends we meet ... well all of this comes together and leaves me a little lost and teary sometimes.  I appreciate comments on instagram that I am a 'supermom'  because I managed to make muffins and play-doh with a newborn  around, but the truth is I often feel staggeringly inadequate.

I have loved this blog, Journey Mama, for many years. She is so beautifully honest about all these same feelings. Maybe everyone doesn't feel them, but she does and she shares them in just the right way. I loved this post of hers I read today about her own self-loathing and her reminder about how God sees us.

posting some unrelated pictures... 

reminders that God is good and things aren't as bad as I tell myself they are :)

a good daddy:

sisters having fun and encouraging each other:

 biggest sister adoring the baby:

Days warm enough to enjoy the outdoors. She went from fussing to cooing and smiling the second the breeze touched her face:

a sling that works like magic to get her to sleep:

an adorable 3 year old:

We are so behind all the Spring pictures I see from the West Coast! 

but still, Spring is coming here too...

more loving. Vera even whispered "I love you Edie" my heart was so happy!!! 

[I may have posted this?]