*Isabel

A very memorable 29th birthday. My Grandma Kay and I had one of those special times that made me feel like I was a little girl - I almost even ordered dessert first at the restaurant. It was such a treat for both of us to later see Isabel Allende speak in person. She's a spunky petite little Latin lady who fit right into the image I had in my head. She's somewhat of a hippie - in the make love/not war sense. Her humor, wit and perspective on life were really inspiring. I heard things that I do in church every week - those things I really need to pay attention to. Her main topic was mamisma - a word whose origin she wasn't quite sure of. It basically means "abundant [female] love" - as in the generous motherly love seen in people like Mother Theresa.

I've thought about her talk on and off since then and especially today. In the last few years, months, weeks and even hours, I've been confronted with issues of hurt-forgiveness-reconciliation [for everyone's reference, I'm not talking about any one instance, but many one-instances. So if you think I'm talking about you, I'm probably not ;)]. I think we can pretty much count on the fact that we are going to hurt our loved ones at some point - and they are going to hurt us. When there is true sorrow and repentance on one end, it really pains me when there is not a full sense of forgiveness on the other. I've found this so intensely true particularly in marriage where if we didn't move on from those hurts, we'd be in a constant state of grudgery. I don't even know where I am going at this point: I've written and erased countless sentences already. I'm just feeling on the hurt end right now and I believe I'll just pray for the grace to love abundantly in these [oh and in so many other] ways.

*p.s. I am just rambling here. I'm not intending to preach, just trying to get out some of the feelings heavy on my mind today.

*p.p.s. We didn't get to meet her in person. We were also towards the back so I didn't get a picture of her speaking - I wish I'd taken one anyway.